Family: Marriage & Parenting, Holistic Health & Wellness

Hey Exhausted Mom: 3 Ways to Stay Feeling Awesome

It’s amazing how much we do as women, isn’t it? We are wives, homeschooling moms, mompreneurs, and so on. If you take any moment and think really deep about it, I’d say we’re pretty flippin’ awesome!

The truth is, we don’t always feel awesome, do we?

I admit that I deal with moments of feeling inadequate, insignificant, and/or misunderstood. But, in order to stay feeling awesome, a mindset shift HAS to happen or you and I both will be wading in the exhausted water a lot longer than we need to.

I have tested and tried three amazing ways that will help you shift from exhausted to awesome, and I want to share them with YOU!

Self-Check

This can be equivalent to self-care, but on another level. I’m talking about taking inner inventory or doing what I’m going to call a deep diagnostic scan. Scan yourself emotionally, mentally, and physically.

Often times we have some deep rooted stuff that is the primary cause of why we’re exhausted and feeling less than our absolute best. There are times where my emotions were out of whack because of *cough* hormones *cough*. In these moments I have to embrace them and actively choose to not let them rule me. I know, I know. It’s a part of being a woman, but sometimes I just want to say uuuggghhh to that!

RELATED POST: Self-Care: How (and why) to Make it Family-Style

Mentally speaking, sometimes it can be the thoughts running through my head. If I’m thinking about negative things, it never fails that I end up putting out and attracting negative vibes. No bueno! Think and meditate on the positive and without a doubt, you will output that (and get it in return).

Something else I’ve realized is if my nutritional intake is not up to par, rarely will I be either. Yep, this means drinking enough fluids (particularly water), eating a healthy amount of fruits and vegetables, and getting as many natural vitamins as possible. With the warmer weather finally coming, lots of outside time gives me a physical boost too!

What does your self-check reveal? Regardless, don’t ignore the warning signs and make any necessary changes!

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Family

Think about your family dynamic. Who are the members in your family? What are the interactions you all have with one another? Are their peculiar patterns that have developed over time?

Now think about the positive and helpful dynamics within that. It could be the way your kids play together, or how the older sibling effortlessly helps the younger. It could be the spark in your eyes when your husband arrives home from a long day of work. Or, how does it feel when you see the happiness of your child who just accomplished something?

RELATE POST: 35 Ways to Deal with Your Kids 24/7

Remembering and thinking on these lovely thoughts have power behind them. On a biological level, having positive thoughts actually stimulates the growth of nerve connections. It increases mental productivity and improves your ability to think.

Not to mention, it affects your view of surroundings, which is key to helping you snap out of feeling anything less than awesome.

When you think about your family, what makes you smile? Cherish those moments!

Friends

I talk to a lot of people, but I have very few friends. Although the word friend gets tossed around and labeled on any and everyone whom most people come in contact with, it’s finding those few friends that are reliable, dependable, and burden bearing.

When you have that connection with someone they help you feel better in those exhausted, overwhelmed moments. They are there to tell you the truth, but also boost you up!

Having a mom tribe that you can count on is definitely a great way to stay feeling awesome!

Who’s in your mom tribe? How have they helped you stay feeling awesome?

My three not-so-secret ways to feeling (and staying) awesome isn’t rocket science. It’s taking life by the reigns and going along for the ride. If I could offer one last piece of advice… go with the flow and don’t be afraid to adjust according to the season you’re in!

CHIME IN: I’d love to hear about what your self-check reveals, how your family makes you smile, and who’s in your mom tribe that helps you stay feeling awesome! Comment below!

Holistic Health & Wellness, Spiritual

What’s So Important About Choosing a Word for the Year?

Okay, so I wasn’t going to jump on the “my word for the year is ____________” bandwagon, but then I thought, “Why not?” There is something to be said about choosing a word (or two) to be your power word(s) for the year.

Before choosing an actual word I threw around the thought that this year was going to be epic. But on a more serious note, there is one word that keeps ringing in my ear, my heart, and my soul…

MY WORD FOR THE YEAR IS…

CULTIVATE.

This word has many definitions, two which I would like to shed light on because they distinctly depict with the utmost accuracy what I am feeling for this year. First is the Google searched definition –

“prepare and use (land) for crops or gardening, and/or try to acquire or develop (a quality, sentiment, or skill).”

After launching With the Huddlestons, I figured that I knew exactly what I was supposed to do. I wanted to write, sell my resources, and offer an online community for like-minded folks all while using the blog as the platform to carry it all out. What I didn’t take into account was the lack of being prepared nor having taken the time to acquire necessary skills.

I found myself all over the place, chasing opportunities that I probably shouldn’t have opted in for, and investing time with little to no return. Don’t get me wrong though. I don’t see this as a bad thing, but more like lessons learned and experiences gained.

The second definition I was drawn to was the Hebrew meaning and understanding. Cultivate in Hebrew is עבד (aw-bad). On the surface it means to work or serve – both near and dear to my vision and mission. However, I took it one step deeper and looked at the Ancient Hebrew meaning of each letter:

Ayin: the eye, look, appearance, to see, understand, experience, to be seen, a fountain
Bet: tent or house, the body, the household or family, inside, within, amid
Dalet: a door, a path, a way of life, movement (into or out of)

Can we pause for a moment and say WOW at the Ancient Hebrew meanings of this word?!?!

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HOW WILL I USE MY WORD THIS YEAR?

Taking into consideration the meaning(s) of cultivate and my experiences gained the first year and a half of launching our new business (plus another one and a nonprofit organization), this word will help me have clarity, stay focused, and execute goals.

SEEING & UNDERSTANDING

Practically speaking, seeing and understanding are two pretty important concepts in life – especially when it comes to walking fully and boldly in your calling. As I look back on all the years I spent chasing what others thought I was supposed to be doing, it only created a sense of hesitance when I finally became bold enough to stop and pursue the “Let it be” that was established for my life by the Creator.

This year part of my cultivating process involves looking within and beyond, understanding how I am to see and be seen, as well as positioning myself to be a fountain of inspiration, encouragement, and empowerment to all those I encounter.

BUILDING FROM WITHIN

Another aspect of the Ancient Hebrew word cultivate involves the household and family. As a wife and mother, these two will always be my number one ministry. Having a successful business is not worth the expense of losing precious and valuable family-time and experiences. Yes, I want to build a legacy for my children; however, the best legacy I will ever be able to leave is love.

Cultivating my marriage will always ensure that we are in a position to properly pour into our children. Cultivating our children will lead to little people who will one day be ready to tackle this world on their own. This is something I am determined to be more mindful of this year, and beyond.

A WAY OF LIFE

The last letter in the Hebrew word עבד (aw-bad) – cultivate – is dalet, and in Ancient Hebrew it means door, path, a way of life, and or movement (particularly in or out of). I love diving into the Hebraic meaning and understanding of words, especially for times like this. It is amazing that this is the last letter of this word. I am purposing to make cultivating a way of life.

This way of life means being prepared to plant seeds, nourish, and reap the harvest. It also means being mindful while in position to be a door of opportunity when a person needs it. It’s being in alignment so I can help show people the path they are destined to take. And lastly, living a cultivating lifestyle prepares me to be a movement maker.

WHY YOU NEED A WORD FOR THE YEAR

There’s no way around how we as human beings were created to think. Yes, there are things that can alter our ways of thinking, but when it comes down to it, there is one concept that Scripture says and science backs up 110% –

“As a man thinks, so is he.” – Proverbs 23:7

What you think and speak over yourself is destined to manifest. It’s proven and it’s a fact. I didn’t give much thought to selecting a word in terms of a way of thinking until I realized that it really does matter. It matters because through this frame of mind is how I will subconsciously see everything.

I spent years living through a lack mentality. Lack of trust in God, my husband, our business ideas, even myself. And through that came lack of confidence, faith, and even finances. After pinpointing the root of that, it made purposefully choosing a word even more powerful. Filtering my chosen word through all areas of my life – spiritually, emotionally, psychologically, and physically – has given me a boost and desire to pursue my dreams.

This will be a year of being prepared, planting seeds, nourishing them, and patiently waiting for the harvest!

So I ask you… what is your word for the year and what does it mean to you? Let me know in the comments below!

 

Family: Marriage & Parenting, Mompreneur

When Your Spouse Is Your Business Partner

In this day and age there are a lot of families choosing to start a home-based family business. Typically, one spouse may stay home to work on the business and before long the other spouse joins them.

This is our story.

A little over a year after starting our business, Bryan and I found ourselves both heavily involved in making it work.

A lot has changed since the beginning. As part of the journey, lessons have [and continue] to be learned.

It’s through this process that I want to share 5 tips for having a successful business relationship when your spouse is your business partner.

Build on a solid foundation.

“If YHVH does not build the house, its builders have labored in vain…”
– Psalm 127:1a

There is an amazing concept to be learned from that Scripture. One that you can see over and over throughout the Bible.

Having a successful business relationship with your spouse starts with building on the solid foundation of YHVH, His Word, and prayer.

Bryan and I constantly pray over our business, down to the smallest detail.

It hasn’t always been that way, and I for one can tell you that there is a huge difference between praying here and there versus being adamant about praying continually.

If you haven’t already done so, try these practical tips for building on a solid foundation:

  • Select a few key verses to write down and put in the area where you do most of your work. I have Scriptures taped to my laptop and on the walls around my little office area.
  • Make it a habit to pray over everything about your business. New product? Pray. New service? Pray. New collaboration(s)? Pray.
  • Don’t forget your why, and revisit it often. It’s easy to get caught in the whirlwind of owning a business, and even easier to do things that aren’t necessarily part of your why. Remembering why you and your spouse started your business will help you stay on track.

Establish clear roles.

There is nothing like trying to build and run a successful business with your spouse but having not a clue of who is doing what.

Or, try building and running a business without letting your spouse do anything.

Bryan and I have been in both of those situations. And until recently, Bryan wasn’t sure what he could do to contribute to the business. And I was Mrs. Do-It-All, not really allowing him to do anything.

“Wives, subject yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Master. Because the husband is head of the wife…”
– Ephesians 5:22-23a

This concept couldn’t be more important especially when it comes to spouses working together.

There may be cases where the wife “owns” the business, but the temptation that comes with that word should never override the Yah-given role given to the husband.

This is another facet of our business that took a lot of navigation through what we call growth opportunity moments.

Moment of transparency here… I had to come to the realization that just because my role “seemed” to carry more weight didn’t mean that I needed to become the head honcho over this thing.

Truth be told, it’s quite the opposite. Bryan’s role in our business may be considered “behind the scenes”, but it is the most important.

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Respect each other’s roles.

It’s one thing to identify roles, and it’s another to actually respect those roles. Big difference.

“In the same way, husbands, live understandingly together, giving respect to the wife, as to the weaker vessel…”
– 1 Peter 3:7

Before your mind starts to wander through all sorts of thoughts about this Scripture, keep in mind the context. It is from yet another passage that speaks of the gender roles of a husband and a wife.

When you read the entire chapter you’ll see that the concept is all built on respect. Respect for and from the husband, as well as respect for and from the wife.

This is super important when your spouse in your business partner.

Those moments when I lacked to include Bryan in any business venture was just down right disrespectful. In the forefront it may have looked all fine and dandy. However, in the background, I was hindering him and our business.

Being respectful doesn’t mean you are cowering down. It means that you value what it is that you and your spouse are trying to build.

Learn to agree.

Yes, I say learn because believe it or not, a business can come to a screeching halt when the business partners don’t agree.

From there a mess can brew, and before you know it, you’re going out of business. (LOL!)

“Would two walk together, without having met?”
– Amos 3:3

Yet another powerful Scripture that lays down a concept that can [and should] be applied to business ownership – especially with your spouse.

For the longest time I would nonchalantly run something by Bryan. I’d introduce it as though it was already a done deal, and if he disagreed, there was a fight.

Not to water down my actions, but I genuinely didn’t know any better.

There was a time when it seemed like our business was a one-man show, but even then I should’ve sought a better understanding of the concept of coming to an agreement.

Fast forward to recent days and we now make it a point to ensure we agree before moving forward with a decision.

Just the other day we couldn’t come to an agreement on a price for a product. So what did we do? After the back and forth, and kicking and screaming [mainly from me], we rested from it.

After taking a break and praying, we then agreed and was able to move forward.

Profitable communication.

Without profitable communication, it would be really hard to build and run a successful business.

And I’m not talking about just any ole kind of communication.

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up displeasure.”
– Proverbs 15:1

“Death and life are in he power of the tongue…”
– Proverbs 18:21a

I talked about growth opportunity moments earlier and it’s fitting to bring them back up here. This is what Bryan and I used to call “arguing.”

In the past when we disagreed, there would be something close to a verbal WW3.

To be more exact, the way I responded would be full of wrath, harsh words, and death. Let me tell you something. That is one of the quickest ways to break down your husband, and in return your marriage and/or whatever else you’re attempting to build.

DON’T DO IT!

Try these practical ways to ensure you have profitable communication with your hubby-business-partner:

  • Make it a point to communicate. Nothing fuels growth opportunity moments more than thinking the other is a mind reader.
  • Communicate often about business matters. This helps keep everything open and up front – no room for errors.
  • Schedule business meetings. Yep! Even when your spouse is your business partner, those meetings still need to happen!

Here’s to a rockin’ business relationship with your spouse.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one lifts his companion up. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up.”
– Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

I’m not suggesting that working with your spouse will always be easy. But what I will say is just what the above Scripture says – two are better than one and they have a good reward for their labor.

I believe there is a special blessing involved when a husband and wife can work side by side, building something from the ground up. Personally speaking, I know that our family is better for it.

CHIME IN: Do you and your spouse work together? What are some ways you make it work and keep your relationship thriving?

Mompreneur

Hey Mompreneur! Do You Have A Business Plan?

Fact.

A lot of mamas start a business with every intention to build it successfully and make money.

Another fact.

Not every mama who starts a business does so successfully, let alone makes a profit.

The problem?

The truth of the matter is the lack of business sense. I’ll be the first to admit that I was that mom. When I look back at every business venture I attempted, I had every good intention on it being able to pay some bills and afford some extra wants in life.

My first issue [and hardest to admit] was that I lacked the basics of knowing how to successfully start a business, let alone run one. The second issue [just as hard to admit] was not listening to my amazingly gifted husband.

Business sense, and all within, comes naturally to him. It’s genuinely a gift the Father has blessed him with. Because I have finally listened to him and come face to face with fixing my business sense, we are now seeing what a successful business looks like.

I know that not every mompreneur has a husband with business sense that comes natural (and a business of helping others have success in their business) – but that’s okay! You can still be successful with all the right tools and skills.

When it comes down to it, the difference between a successful business and the non are just a few key components. My husband, Bryan, says it best – “business is like science – there are elements and components that come together to get a desired result… there is some testing and there will be failures… and there will be results.”

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How do you see failure?

Bryan also suggests that folks (ourselves included) ought to look at business failure from a perspective that is contrary to how we are told to see it. Instead of seeing business failure as a time to throw in the towel or call it quits, look at it as one step closer to figuring out what it is your are truly supposed to be doing.

He also said there are times when you are just so far off that you need to stop and do something else, but that is not always the case.

Sometimes failure in business can be traced back to those few key elements that were left out in the beginning, which was part of my issue. Believe it or not, it has taken me over a year to actually sit down and write out a real business plan.

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I, like so many other business owning mamas, started off trying to fry big fish in a small pan. I wanted my own domain name, lots of content and resources to offer people, tons of blog posts, and bring in lots of income from the start.

All that did was get me off track from what I was supposed to be doing, spending countless hours creating content and resources, none of which profited much. That was until I started taking my husband’s business advice serious.

From setting a schedule that maximized my time to dealing with my lack mentality, I can truly say we have a successful business. I implement what he says and have not been ashamed of having to go back to the drawing board.

Who wants to backtrack?

Part of this includes some backtracking, but again – that’s okay.

Part of my backtracking has been to write a business plan. I looked for a business plan template that was simple, yet powerful, and I couldn’t find one that included everything I needed. If I could have put together a few [almost] good ones that I did find, I would’ve been set. But since I couldn’t, I made one!

The Business Plan Guide for Today’s Mompreneur is what came out of it. This is the perfect business plan guide for any mompreneur looking to get her business started on the right foot (or up to par in my case). It includes the following templates:

  • My business: your why, mission, purpose, vision, and goals + work hours tracker
  • Products & services: pinpoint exactly what they are
  • Market analysis: identify your audience/customers, what they need, how your product/service will help them, etc.
  • Sales & marketing: identify strategies and tactics to implement virtually & locally
  • Financial plan & budget: establish financial forecasts and requirements + the what and how you will achieve financial goals
  • SWOT analysis: identify strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats
  • Resources: list the resources NEEDED (not wanted) to run your business
  • Action plans: stay on top by getting things done

The templates in this guide will help you establish a business plan unique to you and your brand. The eight steps come together like a road map, helping you identify where you want to go and how you will get there.

This is a guide that will walk you through important aspects of your business. So, always keep it handy and make adjustments as needed.

Keep it simple. Keep it specific. And, keep it realistic.

The guide should be so resourceful that you refer to it regularly. Use it to compare your actual performance.

Be intentional and don’t chase the unimportant stuff (trust me, I did that for a long time).

Lastly, get the help you need to learn the skills necessary for making your business successful. If you’re looking for one-on-one support with getting your business started or analyzing the current condition of your business while walking away with a detailed plan of action to reach whatever goals you have set, then I highly recommend contacting my husband, Bryan.

I recommend him not only because he’s my husband, but because he knows what he is talking about. After doing what he advised, we have seen continual growth all throughout our business!

In the meantime, go snag your copy of The Business Plan Guide for Today’s Mompreneur and join my Mompreneur Mastermind inner circle email list for weekly emails to boost your business delivered straight to your inbox!

Plan for success!