Home Education, Spiritual

Hey Homeschool Mom, STOP Letting Limiting Beliefs Define You

Psst… this post is part of Homeschool Success Hacks Blog HopCheck out the other amazing bloggers in this roundup and enter the giveaway (at the bottom) for some awesome homeschool helpers!

Moment of confession: we all have limiting beliefs, am I right? Let’s take our confession a step further and admit that we also allow limiting beliefs define us.

If that weren’t the case there wouldn’t be books, movies, conferences, and blog posts like these to combat it. So now that we aired the dirty laundry, let’s talk about four ways to go from letting our limiting beliefs define us to walking unapologetically authentic – especially as homeschooling moms.

IDENTIFY THEM

Admitting the fact that you have limiting beliefs is a good step forward. But, that’s not enough. Now comes the often overlooked (and daunting) task of identifying them.

What are your limiting beliefs? As a homeschooling mom, you’ve probably believed many of these:

  • I’m afraid I’m not doing a good job.
  • I don’t know how to be mom and teacher.
  • I feel guilty for pulling my kids out of school.
  • I’m worried what other think.
  • Everything I try doesn’t make it better.
  • I don’t know how to handle the hard day.

This list could literally go on and on. And that’s okay. It’s all part of identifying what your limiting beliefs are so you can move on to the next step. Keep in mind and decide now that these beliefs will no longer define you!

FACE THEM

This is where most people stop and try to take a detour, landing them right back at facing them all over again. I did this for a long time. I could admit that I had some pretty stinkin’ thinkin’ about myself, but I wouldn’t face it.

I would brush it off and attempt to go about my merry way being a better wife, mom, homeschooling mom, and business owner. The harsh reality is not facing my limiting beliefs didn’t mean they’d go away.

It meant that it would only be a matter of time before they’d begin to show in everything I attempted to do. I had to come to a place where identifying them wasn’t enough. Facing them wasn’t enough. I wanted them gone.

Facing them prepares you for that. However, it’s consciously choosing that you want to [and will] move beyond simply facing your limiting beliefs – living free of them.

It’s one thing to say, “My homeschool doesn’t look like [hers].” but another thing to believe that you can be okay with your not-so-ordinary homeschool.

When thinking becomes believing, it’s time for the next step.

[amazon_link asins=’1545028672,1724270753,1727118731,0998952249,B01GRMG6NO,1593594852′ template=’ProductCarousel’ store=’withthehuddle-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’e120b364-d939-11e8-9148-8bc80d8d801b’]

REPLACE THEM

In order for you to start seeing a different pep in your step, it’s time to replace your limiting beliefs. This is the point where enough is ENOUGH. No more identifying and facing them and expecting things to miraculously be different.

Now is the time to replace those limiting beliefs with affirmations. And not just any affirmation either. I’m talking about affirmations that get into the depths of your very being, provoking a change that will be evident in your actions.

The limiting belief of – “If I could only get it right!” – becomes – I TRUST MYSELF TO MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION!

“I don’t know how to handle hard days.” becomes I WILL FIND WAYS TO IMPROVISE ON HARD DAYS!

“I can’t figure out how to do this.” becomes I WILL FIND UNIQUE WAYS TO TEACH MY UNIQUE CHILDREN!

An affirmation should be something you can actively walk out, not something you merely say and maybe believe.

EMBRACE THE NEW YOU

Best believe that you will see a big change in every area of your life. Others will notice it too. As you begin to walk out the cycle of-

  • identifying limiting beliefs
  • facing your limiting beliefs
  • replacing the limited belief [with doable affirmations]

you will be a different person. Your new train of thinking will auto-correct your course in those moments when limiting beliefs try to regain control.

Your new thought process will help you see the positive in even the most negative situations. You’ll see blessed instead of stressed. You’ll see how unique you, your children, and your homeschool are (and how awesome that is).

And the biggest thing I’ve noticed in walking this out is that it never stops. Limiting beliefs will always be there to latch on to us. It’s about coming to the point where we decide to not let our limiting beliefs define us.

HELP IS HERE

In my best-selling book, Just for Today’s Homeschooling Mom, I tackle ten chapters worth of limiting beliefs.

At the end of every chapter, I help you identify the most common limiting beliefs that we as homeschooling moms deal with and provide you with life-changing affirmations.

You’ll also find Scripture for meditating and journaling, as well as prayer and journal space for noting your personal reflections.

Before you go…

Get your free Conquer Limiting Beliefs printable and join our thriving virtual community!

 

CHIME IN: What are some limiting beliefs you struggle with? Let me know in the comments below! Try the method mentioned above and let me know how it helped you!

CLICK HERE TO VISIT THE HOMESCHOOL SUCCESS HACKS MAIN PAGE

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Home Education

The DIY Homeschool Curriculum Method

Everywhere you look you can find something related to DIY – do it yourself. From garden landscaping to home upgrades, doing it yourself is no surprise. What about when it comes to planning your own homeschool curriculum? Before you panic and leave, allow me to tell you five reasons how planning your own curriculum can be a game changer for your homeschool (and your sanity).

Voice

Planning your own homeschool curriculum gives you a voice. Each and every homeschooling family has unique children with unique learning styles. Moms (and dads) are also bringing their unique [teaching] styles to the table. When you are in control of what you want your children to learn, and what you want to teach, you are exercising your right to voice that!

Choice

As mentioned a little bit before, planning your own curriculum gives you the freedom to choose. Of course people choose different boxed [pre-set] curricula because something resonates with them and the company who made it… but what if this isn’t your case? What if you are having a hard time finding curricula to accommodate your homeschool? Now enters the next game changer…

[amazon_link asins=’1545028672,B07M9D3CH2′ template=’ProductCarousel’ store=’withthehuddle-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’76246003-126c-4354-927f-42d283b64bea’]

Accommodate

By planning your own homeschool curriculum, you are able to accommodate the varying abilities that each and every homeschool encounters at some point in time. Whether you have a reluctant reader, an active kiddo who only sits still for 5 minutes at a time, or an eighth grader struggling with math – you can accommodate that.

Versatile

Versatility is one of the most important reasons why moms [and dads] choose the homeschooling curricula they do. But what happens when you get that boxed curricula in only to find out it’s not as versatile as was advertised? The wallet may not be as versatile to keep affording to switch things up until you find something that works. Planning your own curriculum allows a versatility like no other.

Affordable

There is no question about it that planning your own homeschool curriculum is one of the cheapest routes to take when trying to save a buck. With the proper resources and support, countless of homeschooling families are finding out that they can homeschool for free!

I just so happen to be one of those people who have a tried and true system in place for DIY Curriculum Planning. I started planning my own curriculum from the beginning and haven’t deviated from it going on six years later. From online resources to books schools are about to toss in the trash – I started gathering and doing things in a way that has me spending less than $100 on curriculum each and every year.

 

You can do this too! Just ask me how!

CHIME IN: do you plan your own curriculum? What are some resources you can’t homeschool without? Share in the comments!

Home Education

Sometimes They Don’t Want to Learn It!

Sometimes They Don’t Want to Learn It! is part of the Back to Homeschool: Mind Over Matter blog series. This post has been provided by LM Preston from Empowered Steps.

There are many subjects my kids didn’t want to learn. Also, tons of activities and skills they simply refused participate in – until I signed them up and made them do it. Only to find out they loved the topic or the activity.

GROWING UP WE HAVE TO DO THINGS WE DON’T WANT TO DO

Many of us wouldn’t want to work if we didn’t need food, house, or shelter. The thing is, as an adult, we need to do things we like and DON’T like exceptionally well. It’s part of owning up to responsibility and expanding ourselves in intangible ways. Learning perseverance, ingenuity, exploring new things, expanding our ability to find something interesting in a topic that may not seem interesting.

TEACHING CHILDREN TO THRIVE IN SUBJECTS THEY DON’T LIKE HELPS THEM IN LIFE

Teaching your child to exceed under less than favorable circumstances actually enhances their ability to figure out better ways to get things done. 

Challenge them by teaching:

  • If you don’t like the topic, tell me how you would make it better?
  • How can you learn this, but in a way that works for you?
  • Teach me the topic.
  • How can you just get the job done?

HOW TO TEACH BORING TOPICS

Some strategies are: 

Get to know just the facts: Teach them to define six questions WHAT, WHEN, WHY, WHO and WHERE then ask the HOW. 

Ask them the questions: 

  1. Why you don’t like it?
  2. State the problem and then the solution to the reason why you don’t like it.
  3. Keep your materials neat and make you want to touch it.
  4. How can you stop procrastination? Do the subject before your favorites or be someone inspiring.
  5. Draw the notes by mind mapping it. 

Getting a positive start: 

  1. Make the topic into a game.
  2. Take small bites of the information and reward yourself with positive affirmations or music.
  3. Introduce it in light and comedic ways using videos or cartoons.
  4. Exercise for fun, jumping rope, jumping jacks, push ups, sit ups. 

[amazon_link asins=’1545028672,B07J3Z9R23,1074511824,1641520817,B01MU7QSWR’ template=’ProductCarousel’ store=’withthehuddle-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’0a9217ad-9f44-4b54-a09d-149e6952bab5′]

Expose your child by: 

  1. Visual Stimulation a movie, video something light.
  2. Read it to get deeper.
  3. Write notes and/or draw notes for mind mapping.
  4. Recite it.
  5. Teach it.
  6. Play a memory game with it.
  7. Know the what, when, why, who, where and HOW.

Read more innovative ways to teach the subjects that your children don’t want to learn hereBefore you go, don’t forget to enter the back to homeschool bundle giveaway and comment below with any concerns you may have with homeschooling. We are here to support you!

[giveaway id=9402]


Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, closeupLM Preston is an author, engineer, former college professor, and working mother who’s been married for over twenty-five years. She homeschooled 3 of her 4 children from elementary school and beyond while she and her husband worked outside their home. Three of her kids graduated with degrees by the age of 17 years old. Connect with her at Homeschool and Work and Empowered Steps.

 

 

Home Education

What if your child isn’t really struggling academically?

I’ve been on both sides of the turf. Having spent several years in the school system as a Curriculum Specialist Assistant, Tutor, and Preschool Teacher, I’ve seen academically challenged students.

On the other side, I’m a mom of four kiddos who are being homeschooled by me and their father. From this aspect things look a little differently. Pinpointing an academic struggle in a child can sometimes be the wrong call. So, how do you know if your child is really struggling academically?

There are five questions I’d like you to ask yourself, and five tips I suggest to help ease the pressure off you and your child.

My Story

Before getting into the questions and tips, I’d like to share my personal experience with wrongfully labeling one of my children. Our third born, Euphrates, would be considered late to most stats and labels today. He was well into being two-years-old and none of us could understand him.

He not only couldn’t form words properly, but he also chose a more silent route. He just didn’t talk that much. Being the mom with an education background and a Google search queen, I took to finding out what was wrong with my child… in all the wrong places.

I went into speech therapy Facebook groups. I even held an online Homeschooling with Exceptionalities event and made sure to have a speaker that talked about various speech issues. I Google searched. And I was ready to call in some outside help.

Bryan and I even had our own parent-teacher conference and mapped out some things we could do differently to try and spark his speaking and work on his language skills. But the one thing I failed to do was look at my child.

I failed to step back and really monitor him. It was only after Bryan mentioned that I stop being a crazy person and just let him develop how he is developing. Watch him for awhile, and look for natural ways to help him. Lo and behold, it worked. His issue wasn’t something that needed intervention, speech pathologists, or even extra time going over flashcards. He needed time.

That’s why I wanted to write this blog post. Because there are so many homeschooling mamas who are stressed and wondering if there is something wrong with their child academically. I’m willing to bet that over half of the concerned homeschooling mamas actually have nothing to worry about. I’ve seen it. Shoot, I’ve lived it.

Disclaimer: If you believe there is an academically-challenging issue with your child, please use your own discretion in seeking the proper help.

[amazon_link asins=’0996134786,1545028672,1727573781,172868921X,B07KWY2SMK,B072F75ZBT,B079C4GWWY,B07BPS8QDG’ template=’ProductCarousel’ store=’withthehuddle-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’2d63eb9f-0526-11e9-b57b-67fb68c817a4′]

Are your expectations set too high?

This is an issue that we all encounter in every area of life, but especially as homeschoolers. We are pressed by what others thing, what the government thinks, what the people who come up with the developmental milestones think, and so on.

All of this bombards our thoughts and can lead us down a path of setting the bar extremely too high. And for what? So we can say that Molly has been reading since the age four? Or that Sean is doing high school math in the 5th grade?

I will be the first to admit that I have set some pretty high expectations for my children, only to resign them and tweak them to something more realistic.

My tip for you about setting high expectations is to – RELAX. Yes, relax. With there being so many approaches to home education, don’t worry about trying to align with any of them. If I had to suggest one, though, I’d go all in with the child-led approach. This doesn’t mean let them do whatever they want. Nope. It simply means following their lead and using their unique developmental journey as the guide.

Are you motivated by comparing?

This is another biggie. As homeschooling continues to thrive and become normalized, there are groups, COOPs, and programs popping up all over the place (and virtually). This means more and more moms have opportunities to talk about how they’re homeschooling and even share a few stats here and there.

No-no number one will ALWAYS be sharing and/or receiving for self-validation. I say that because deep down we may all do it. We want to be validated in what we are doing, especially when we have taken our children’s education into our own hands. We want to prove to people that “we got this!”

My tip for you about being motivated by comparing is to – STOP. Genuinely be happy for others and where they are in their journey, but beyond that, ignore it and embrace your own journey. You will always know what is best for your children. Never deviate from that.

Are you ignoring the strong areas?

In most cases we overlook strong areas and check them off as milestones reached. But what if we have it all wrong? Perhaps ignoring strong areas can be a hindrance when trying to work on its polar opposite (which we’ll discuss next).

A strong area for a child doesn’t necessarily mean that it is one to be ignored and checked off the list. It simply means that perhaps less help and/or instruction is needed for that particular area.

My tip for ignoring strong areas is – USE THEM. If you are homeschooling multiples, allowing your child to help their siblings (using their strong suit) can not only help give them purpose, but it can also keep that area sharp.

Are you placing too much focus on weak areas?

This can go hand-in-hand with the previous question because while you may be too focused on the weak area, bringing their strong suit into play may actually help.

Author and Education Strategist Anita Gibson shares in her book, Star Finder,  that-

“most of us were brought up with people focusing on our areas of weakness. They didn’t mean any harm; their desire was to see us improve in an area that may have hindered us in some way.”

As a homeschooling mom, that quote right there was the foundation to why I wanted to fix my nonverbal two-year-old. In my mind I saw a hindered child because he wasn’t communicating to my liking. As Anita goes on to suggest, it starts with reframing our thinking. Without doing this, you get frustrated… your child becomes frustrated… then everyone is at wits end feeling like there’s nothing else anyone can do.

My tip for placing too much focus on weak areas is – DON’T FORCE IT. Instead of forcing your child to improve in their weak areas, try to find unique and creative ways to build in on them through fun and interactive activities.

Are you correctly identifying the area of concern?

This is another question that almost seems like a cache 22. Back to story about my son, because I placed so much emphasis on his weakness and what he wasn’t doing, I ignored what were some of the root causes to his muteness.

I figured since me and his dad talk all the time, and his two older siblings talked all the time, surely he would pick it right up. I didn’t see the times when he was trying to communicate but was ignored. Or the times when he needed help with something and instead we just did it for him. When Bryan pointed those two key things out to me, I thought no wonder! Be ignored and have things done for you enough times and you begin to accommodate to that.

This is also something I had to realize with behavior “issues.” When my children begin acting out of character, instead of jumping all over them, I begin the watch process. I watch and see if there is a need not being met that they can’t quite identify and I go from there. Nine times out of ten, it’s simply a case of unmet needs.

Of course I don’t always get it right and it’s a work-in-progress, but that’s just it… My tip for correctly identifying areas of concern is – WATCH. Step back and analyze your child by watching them. They will most likely reveal the issue and often times even better when we’re not standing over them forcing what we think is the problem.

A new way of looking at it…

There are all sorts of labels we can put on our children. With that comes the pressures of fixing and/or removing those labels. May I suggest a new ways of looking at your child’s academic journey?

1. You are more powerful than you think. You have been given the unique and awesome role as a parent and with that comes the amazing journey of figuring out their God-giving gifts and abilities. It will take time, and it will take patience… but they are there.

2. Create a positive schooling experience. Dr. Sheva and I talked thoroughly about the difference between schooling and educating, and either way you look at it, our children should be able to look back and have positive things to say about their academic journey.

3. Take care of yourself. When you are operating at your full potential, that pours over onto your children. This means making time for self-care and not feeling guilty about it!

4. Be a STAR finder. In Anita’s book, she talks about what it means to be a star finder. STAR is an acronym that stands for strengths, talents, abilities, and resources. She walks you through each of these areas, showing us parents a new way to think about our “struggling” students.

I’ve mentioned Anita’s book, Star Finder, several times so I can’t help but end with telling you that it is a must have. It is packed with personal testimonies and real strategies that have been tested, tried, and proven true to helping parents celebrate what their children have versus what they don’t have.

You can also catch an interview I did with Anita talking about this book, and more – CLICK HERE!

I’m also including a free EXCLUSIVE printable – a 5-page Individual Profile Pack – that can be used year after year to help you track your child’s individual and unique developmental journey. This is from my Frugal Moms Guide to DIY Curriculum Planning masterclass for moms.

With this pack you’ll be able to:

  • make special notes and set goals
  • note specific skills that may need improving
  • note any resources, products, activities, etc. that will be used to help
  • document new skills to focus on
  • and have space to jot down additional notes

I recommend notating your child’s strengths and seeing how they can naturally help in areas that may be considered weak. You may download and print as many copies as you need for personal use. Please do not share PDF, but do share this blog post so others can take advantage of it!

CHIME IN: How have you navigated figuring out if your child is really struggling academically? What did you (or didn’t) you do? Share in the comments below!