I know that we are just starting into the spring months and Thanksgiving is a couple of seasons away but I feel in my spirit that this story needs to be shared now. So let’s dig in, shall we?
One Thanksgiving morning I entered the kitchen to start preparing everything so we could head to my grandmas ranch later that day. I had been to what felt like 1,000 stores in the weeks leading up to the big day and I had everything except the fresh green-beans. I meant to grab them the day before but as usual life happened. It has a funny way of doing that! So I sent my husband out into the grocery store madness. Bless his heart!
I was pressed for time because of everything I had volunteered to make. I had once again overextended myself. I had to make all of this and then drive an hour to take the food out to the ranch.
Let’s just say due to my own overextending my anxiety level was already amped up and I was wishing we could forget about the ranch and all just go eat at Luby’s.
To be brutally honest when I asked my husband to go pick up the fresh green beans I already had this preconceived idea that he would somehow get the wrong thing. I mean because everytime he had went to the store in the past this was usually the case and when he got back I would throw a complete fit over it. Looking back now at this episode I can clearly see how ungrateful I was. At the time I really had no idea that my behavior was so bad!
Let me explain.
God is so good even when we mess up. You see where I am in my faith now is not where I’ve always been. It took a whole lot of messing up and “learning experiences” to get where I’m currently at. ( I have a long way to go still )
In all seriousness though on this particular Thanksgiving day something changed for me. When he arrived back at the house with the fresh beans I said thank you and proceeded to open the bag.
As I peered into the bag and pulled out the beans they were in fact fresh and they were green. But they were the ones that cost like $5 a lb because there all pretty, washed and trimmed and ready to go in a cute little bag. Here we go I thought…..I was starting to get upset. All I could think about in my head was how much cheaper the other ones would have cost and then that thought grew and went on and on. Like a never ending story of things that I could get upset about. Another thought and yet another to another. Usually by now I would have had steam coming out of my ears. I was looking at the beans and then looking at him smiling but in that moment I really wanted to say something negative. But I paused.
Because something different happened in that moment.
Somewhere in the mess of all these thoughts was this small little voice saying, “just be grateful.” Who cares if they cost more, just be grateful you have someone willing to go to the store. Be grateful for the husband you have. So I held my tongue from what I wanted to say and told my husband again thank you for going to the store. It was in that moment that I began to change.
Maybe you were raised in a perfect family and never inherited bad habits like control issues, anger, yelling and getting upset for not getting your way. Your so lucky. I wasn’t. As a kid I grew up in a house that was so very dysfunctional and I was never taught how to be a good wife, a good mom or even a godly woman. It was kinda like a free for all. No home training and just do whatever you want to do type of environment. God really had to do a work in me, and I’m far from done! At the time there was unhealed dysfunction from my past and I didn’t even realize it was affecting me, my family and my marriage.
But something in that moment changed ever so slightly. This time I had caught myself from going on a full fledged rampage to saying thank you and just cooking those darn beans. So what was different this time around? Well first off I payed attention to that still small voice saying, “Just be grateful.” I also paused, reflected on the situation, and took a look at the bigger picture and just said ok. Yes, I will just be grateful! As I did this I was able to see that He was only trying to be helpful buy getting the beans that required less work on my part. Yikes! Wow. That was pretty eye opening for me. Have you ever been in a similar situation?
So often we get all caught up in the moment of having it our way and we fail to see the other side of the story. We fail to see the situation from a What I now call, “ The God Lense”
Maybe you did grow up with a similar background to mine and you are still struggling with negative thoughts, self control issues or something else entirely. If not perhaps you know someone else who is. Here is the bad news, there is no quick fix for these things. It takes time and requires change in mindsets and a change in habits. It takes effort.
Unrealistic expectations, perfectionism, negative words, thoughts or actions can be detrimental to a relationship. But the good news is God wants to heal in these areas. He wants us all to be healed and whole in every area of our lives. We first have to surrender everything to him. It may not make sense to you right now but the more you trust in HIM the easier letting go of these negative habits are.
Here is a prayer to bless us today.
Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for caring so much about me and all that I am currently going through. I know I haven’t always made the best choices or said the nicest things to the people around me especially those who are close to me. Today I confess any negative words, thoughts or actions as sin and I repent from these things. Lord it says in your word that if we confess our sins, you Lord are faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9 NIV) Help me to be a better person to those who matter most to you. Help me get my attitude right and see each situation from your perspective. Help strengthen Family bonds and relationships. It says in your word that you make your saving help my shield, and your right hand sustains me; your help has made me great. (Psalm 18:35) Thank you for never leaving me and never forsaking me (Deut 31:8) Father even when I fall short you still care deeply about me because I am your child. I know I can do all things through Messiah who strengthens me.(Philippians 4:13) In Yeshua’s name AMEN
I hope this has encouraged you today!
XOXO – Krissy Scoon
Krissy Scoon is a wife, homeschooling mom, and blogger. She loves God and has a genuine desire to see other people’s lives change for the better. That’s why you’ll catch her blogging at So Necessary about real life topics that impact today’s families.